Those little things in life

Being in South Korea and not being from South Korea often gives one the opportunity to think about a lot of the little things in life, the things that you grew accustomed to but miss now that you no longer have access to them. Lately, for reasons that might be obvious to some, I've been thinking a lot about things that I wish were here but just aren't. Since I can't have them, and quite possibly may never see them again, I thought I'd take a few moments in what may be one of my final posts to talk about some of them.

1. First, diet Dr Pepper. Yep, that beverage is probably my favorite beverage ever. I found I was ocassionally able to find it on the blackmarket here in Itaewon, but other than that, you can't buy it here. You can buy regular Dr Pepper, but I hate regular sugar sodas (or corn syrup sodas, if you buy them back in the states). Finding diet Dr Pepper has been an epic quest all on its own. I finally gave up and just realized I would have to go without. Unfortunately, the closest replacement is Coca Cola Zero, and it tastes a lot like battery acid, without that refreshing battery acid taste.

2. College-ruled lined paper. Never thought I'd miss that. They have paper here that feels like I'm in kindergarten again trying to write for the first time. Why they can't sell mass amounts of regular lined paper, I don't know. Oh, you can buy a notebook with lined paper in it, but loose sheets of paper, which I love to write with can't be found. Or if you do find it, it's really funky looking.

3. Computer software. Unless you're a fan of Starcraft, finding ANY title in Korea is almost impossible. The solution is to buy it online, so you can buy it off of Steam (the Valve network). But if you're not in the USA, Steam doesn't give you anywhere near the selection you can buy there. I've been itching to play Sid Meier's Civilization 4: Colonization ever since I heard about it being released, as I was a huge fan of the old Colonization. Can't get it here. At all. Same thing happens with a lot of software titles. Part of the problem is that so many people in Korea pirate software. But the ones they punish are the ones who would actually pay for the games.

4. Microwave pizza. All you can find are really ridiculous types of pizza that no human should ever eat. Lotte Department stores sells a microwave gourmet cheese pizza that I found for 8,000 won (about $6.50). I bought one. A week later, it was 9,500 won. A week after that, it went to 11,500 won. It's not worth the price. I can buy take out (there's a Pizza Hut a few blocks from me that charges 13,000 won for a tiny cheese pizza, and there's a Pizza School outlet a little further away that charges 7,000 won for a pretty nice sized pizza, except for some reason they put corn in it).

5. Dishwashers. I hate doing dishes. Really hate it. You can't find a dishwasher here. There might be some in some obscure place, but who knows where?

6. DVDs. I mean regular ones that aren't pirated. There's one store in the CoEx mall that sells some tv seasons on dvd, but there are very few selections available. I miss walking into a Best Buy and having every DVD I've ever wanted right there in front of me, AND cheap.

7. English language phones. Preferably an iPhone. I have a cell phone that I can't use other than to receive calls. Can't figure out how to access the net with it. I think you can. Can't figure out how to send a text message because I still have no idea as to what key I press to mimick the space bar. Tried everything. Finally gave up. Also, I receive nonstop spam messages in Korean on this phone. Either someone is trying to advertise some sex service to me, or Jack Bauer is trying to tell me that I have to stop Magabe Buwato from setting off a nuclear explosion in LA. So far there hasn't been a nuclear explosion in LA, so I'm thinking the texts have been about sex services. Sorry, Jack.

8. A heater in English. I still don't understand what settings I have it on. I asked two Korean women I work with to take a look at a scan of my heater console, and they "guessed" that I should turn two nobs on the console, meaning that even if you are able to read the language fluently, you still haven't a clue how to operate the stupid thing.

9. A solid bed. I am using a bed with a mattress that has what feels like spikes sticking out of it. Complained about it. No one cares. Can't figure out how to replace it because even if I had the money to buy a new mattress, NO ONE understands that I need it delivered. Even if I speak in FLUENT KOREAN, they act like I'm speaking Swahili to them. God, I hate this stupid language. And I hate their beds. Or at least this one.

10. Eggo syrup. They sell Eggo Waffles at Costco. Not syrup. Not sure why. The syrup is Korea was designed by some evil criminal mastermind who uses it to keep his soldiers in line ("if you do not do as I say, I will make you consume the Korean syrup from Emart").

11. A TV guide that actually explains what's on Korean television. Instead, you get a remote control and about 200 or so channels to continuously click through, knowing you'll never find anything to watch because 40 percent of the channels don't register.

Anyway, that's my rant for right now. As I'm now 2 weeks and a day into not having been paid, AND having to work....

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