Why I Write

I know some of those who read my stuff aren't real science fiction fans, so hang in there with me for a second cause I have to go all geek like to make this point. There's a scene in Star Trek: First Contact where Picard is having a conversation with the actress Alfre Woodard (a stellar actress in her own right), right before he goes into one of the greatest monologues of all Star Trek history, and he starts it off by stating: "I have a certain perspective when it comes to the Borg." And those who were fans of the show know that he was once kidnapped, turned into one of them, forced to destroy many of his friends and comrades while helpless to do anything to stop himself from doing so. Yes, a certain "perspective". So whenever I'm asked why I write, I think back at that moment, and I say that I have a certain perspective when it comes to writing.

What that means is that I've lived a life that's very different than most others. That doesn't mean it was better, more introspective or whatever. It just means that my whole life seems to have been designed around giving me a different perspective on the way of seeing life and the world around me. So, when I write, I like to think that my third eye, as some writers, specifically Stephen King, have pointed out, sees things differently than most other people. And as a result, I like to share that perspective with others, because I often fear that no one else will ever have that perspective to share with the rest of the world, because my perspective is strange, and thus, I think needed.

But I'm sure most people feel that way about themselves, so I don't purport to be superior to others, or to be more significant in my knowledge. I just happen to be a certain kind of information sponge who grabs many things, puts it through a really bizarre blender and then spits it back out as "perspective".

And I've always felt that way, even though my background hasn't always been so varied. I felt this way before I went to West Point. I thought I had a pretty strong handle on the world back then. I hadn't experienced ANYTHING, but I sure felt I had. Then there was West Point. Then there was my time in the service, which has given me a seriously distorted background that has added all sorts of nuance to that perspective. There were things you do in the military that automatically give you a different sense. There were things people don't normally do in the military that I did in the military that add to that sense. Then there were the places I went, and the experiences I had with the many people of those places. It seemed like most of my life was designed around exposing me to things other people don't see. Things from burnt out villages, abandoned ghost towns, roming Roma families, shysters, scammers, brilliant scientists, murderers, treasonous villains who would sell out their mothers (some who did), people who would look me in the eye and lie to me even as I knew they were lying to me, world-traveling doogooders who no one would ever know because they never sought out notoriety for what they were doing, crazy nutcases that had more power and responsibility than anyone should ever have, mysterious strangers who would fade in and out of my life at times (sometimes reappearing at odd times, and other times never being seen again), and all sorts of others that I can honestly say have helped me to see the world as such a different place with so many different perspectives.

And when I was a kid, living a very unimportant life, realizing that I was probably never going to do anything to make a difference anywhere or to anyone, teachers started to tell me that I had a gift of writing, that it was something I should pursue and continue to do. And then people kept telling me this, until I realized that it wasn't just something people say to kids, but they were serious about it. And then I started to sell my writing, and I realized that I loved to communicate with people. That sort of put me on a path that I've been traveling ever since.

What I discovered with writing is that I began to love the process as much as the communicating. There are all sorts of nuances that make it so much more interesting and fascinating as a process. In the beginning, I was writing just to communicate a message, but these days I explore each new story with the perspective of challenging myself to write differently to provide the story that needs to be provided in whatever fashion that best fits the process. And while it may not seem that way, it opens up a whole world of possibilities when it comes to writing. Even the name of a character can have massive symbolic, intuitive value. Sometimes, you can even create a sense of writing that hides a whole fabric of writing within its world, so that someone would have to actually be very introspective and careful to make sure that he or she found exactly what was really being written. I got to do that with a humorous novel I wrote, and it was so much fun because I was challenged the entire time I was writing it, and at the same time I got to really stretch the limits of what I was capable of, realizing that I couldn't have written that same book ten years ago. Which puts forth the possibility that there are novels waiting to be written by me that I'm not even capable of writing today, just because I haen't learned what is necessary to bring the writing to that level yet.

That is why I write. It is for me both a process and an ultimate challenge. It's the only challenge that I am capable of putting forth for myself, completely aware that any laziness on my part leads to complete failure, but complete effort leads to results I can't even yet begin to imagine. Again, that is why I write.

I guess you could say it gives me a certain perspective when it comes to the activity. Picard would be so proud.

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