A piece of poetry I wrote about a trip I took during this winter break

Loving Father
I remember the first time
my dad played catch with me.
I remember him running behind me
the first time
I tried to ride my bike
without the training wheels.
I remember him telling me the only way
to deal with Andy
the school bully
was to face him
and fight back
I remember him telling me
he'd be proud
of me
no matter what I chose to do with my life.

Actually,
None of that is true.

My first memory of my father
was discovering a web page link
to an LA tombstone
10 years ago
Indicating,
He'd been buried
Not far
From where I lived most of my life.

I wondered
how he could live so close
yet be so far.
I wondered
if he'd ever seen me
or had I seen him.
Had he left
Because of commitment
Or did commitment
Leave him?
Was he just not
ready
to be a father?

As I stand here today
Standing over your grave
A long-lost son
Paying respects
To a long-lost dad,
I see the inscription
And the flowers
Fall from my hands
And scatter themselves
across the freshly mowed grass.

Kenneth Gundrum
Deceased
"Loving Father"

I fly home confused
And betrayed.

---Duane Gundrum, 2003

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Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Well, went and saw the movie today. There were some really powerful scenes in it, and I think it did a great job. Some of the battle scenes were beyond stellar, but for some reason, it was the little emotional touches they threw in here and there that sort of did it for me. There were a lot of little humor moments, but there's one exchange between Gimli (the dwarf) and Legolas (the ranger elf) that actually had me busting up out loud because it was such a perfect delivery. I won't say what it is because I'm sure you'll all figure it out when you see it.

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Domain Leeches
Okay, this is really pissing me off. I changed domain names last year to the Sarbonn.com one, and just today I accidentally wandered back to my old domain (based on a previous link I had), and it's now a porn site links page. Someone bought my former domain name and put up a DomainParking service, which is one of those services where they buy a ton of expired domain names in hopes of getting people to pay through the ass for their name back.

Granted, I don't intend to ever use that domain again, but friends I haven't heard from in ages might try to contact me through that old address, and all they're going to get is a porn linkage site now.

I'm really getting tired of how people are opportunistically destroying the internet.

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A Gloomy Prediction For This Country
I was discussing this in another forum, and it just sort of grew from some of the really depressing predictions I've been having for this country, stemming from my interpretations of Fiorina's Divided Government and Jacobson's The Politics of Congressional Elections. While neither text says exactly this, I combined the two (utilizing projections from Jacobson's first edition of the book combined with the latest edition of the same book) and came up with a belief that the Democratic Party is doomed, specifically due to access to PAC money by incumbent players (Democrats can't get access unless incumbents while Republicans can). So, this is what I wrote as part of my follow up to one of these arguments:

I think we're moving towards an aristocratic type government that will for a long time pretend to be what the United States used to be. We will claim to be the country of freedom, even as we move to remove freedoms in the name of security and stability. We will respond to criticisms against our country with hostility towards other countries by claiming they are in opposition to this free country we have. Meanwhile, we will continue to move towards one party control of our government. I doubt it would move towards communism, as that would be a direction in the opposite direction. I can see us moving to a pseudo facist government style, but again under the trappings that indicates that we are still a democracy. The moment ANYONE moves to start calling ourselves anything but a democracy will be the spark that causes revolution, and nobody is stupid enough to make that happen.

Instead, we will start to see little moves that make it happen anyway.

We will see the media start to be curtailed in the name of patriotism and bad journalism.

Morality police will continue to push forward agendas of "cleansing" America of those that threaten to destroy our moral values.

Opposition parties will be scoffed at and given opportunities to influence policy ONLY if they sign onto the Republican platform of major reform only.

Education will become less funded because education is a "local" issue and money is needed to handle much more important things.

Corporations will become extremely powerful and become pretty much the only influential voice to the main political party.

Eventually, the political party itself will split into a two-party system so that you will see an opposition emerge, but it will be unlike what we have today. Instead, you will see two conservative groups emerge, one much like we have today, and one EXTREMELY conservative. Liberal policies will be rarely focused upon by either party, and the public will accept it because if they see opposition, they will join one or the other side, thinking anyone that wants outside of the two party system is obviously a person who doesn't deserve to be part of the system in the first place.

All during this process, people will deny it is ever happening. Those who deny it in public will pretty much be the apologists for the actions that will happen. People are so scared of instability that they will believe whatever it takes so that they can continue with their natural lives. One little freedom here or there isn't going to bother them. A lot of freedoms at one time would, which is why it will happen slowly so that no one group has time to mount any type of opposition.

That's what I predict. Those who are all happy with the way things are moving will deny anything is happening at all and look at these projections as gloom and horror predictions, laughing it off. I don't care anymore. I even thought of writing my disseration on this particular subject because of how important I know it is. Then, I realized that no one cares, including academia, so I decided to write my dissertation on the demise of the third party movement instead. I'll sit in an ivory tower and watch the events take place and mourn the democracy we once had, but sadly, not care. Why care for something that no one else wants to even try to save? To even bring it up means becoming a partisan target, and I'm so tired of being lumped in with groups of people I'm not a spokesperson for.

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Grades
Well, grades finally were released on the net. I already knew what I was getting in my course on the World Bank from Dr. Miller-Adams, and it was a BA. I was pretty peeved at that grade because of the amount of work that I had to do for that class that really was above and beyond what was necessary. But I'll live with it.

In Dr. Corder's class I received an A. And I'm pretty happy about that. This was one of those courses with so much reading required as part of it, and I read every single detail, including a few other important works that I read so I could grasp the information even further considering the welfare state reforms during the 19th century and the early part of the 20th.

It also appears that I'll be the TA for Dr. Kuersten again next semester. That's cool with me because I enjoy working for her. Sure, it's a lot of work, but after balancing out all of that, it was definitely a cool assignment for the semester.

I'm kind of in a bind on what to do about the next semester for my own classes. I'm scheduled to take a class on image and memory through the history department, which is something that I'm interested in exploring as a possible idea for my research method of my dissertation. The other class I am signed up for is Dr. Miller-Adams's poverty class, and I am starting to wonder how to really fit that into what I'm doing in this field. I may drop that class over this break and pick up a sociology class on qualitative research methods instead. I haven't made up my mind yet.

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The kinds of arguments I really like
I was in somewhat of a heated argument with someone about a computer game called Sim City 3000. He said something about how the game was designed, and I said actually that was not true. He swore up and down over and over about how he logged more time on that game than I did, going over and over about how the particular area of the game we were discussing was something he'd become somewhat of an expert on. So, I finally asked him (so everyone else could see) to check the credits of the game and then come back and tell me he knows more.

He never responded, but everyone else did, and suddenly everyone wanted to know more about what it was like to work on that game.

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This final paper
I'm having a real hard time figuring out what to do with this last paper for Dr. C's class, and the more I read over the questions, the less I feel I know about the topic. I started writing one of the three essays, and I stopped about a page and a half into it thinking, what am I trying to say here?

I wish this semester was over.

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Angels in America
I tried watching this the other night, and oh my, I couldn't believe how many times they had to use the F-word during this presentation. Usually, I could care less, but after awhile I started to feel like one of those old ladies from the 1950s constantly scolding people for having "potty mouths" because it was just out of control. It wasn't pushing forward the story any, and it certainly wasn't getting me to believe in the characters more by hearing them swear in EVERY sentence over and over again.

I finally stopped watching it. It might have been a great movie, and I was kind of looking forward to seeing Emma Thompson as an angel (which fortunately I caught by accident during a later showing so I could miss the rest of the movie and just catch that at the very end), but sometimes I think they take the swearing a bit too far.

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Finally ordered the Paris Hilton Sex Tape
Yes, after 10,000 emails telling me I should order the Paris Hilton Sex Tape, I decided I finally must have it. Yes, I avoided it for the last few weeks, thinking to myself that a) I don't like Paris Hilton and b) that I would never buy something as stupid as this. But no, I decided today I must have it because the 10,001st email finally broke me down, causing me to buy it.

Yeah, right.

I am so sick of spam.

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These NEWS flashes
The following is a real news announcement that was posted to a board where I contribute postings. It is a real news story. The one that follows it is a typical Duane response:


Bush to announce new space mission

WASHINGTON, Dec. 3 (UPI) -- President George W. Bush will reportedly announce a big new space mission, returning Americans to the moon.

The National Review reported Wednesday the announcement is expected Dec. 17, the 100th anniversary of the first manned flight by the Wright brothers.

The magazine said the content of the president's speech does not appear to be in doubt; the only question is timing.

Said the review: "While those who have formulated it (the president's speech) have argued that it be delivered on the anniversary of the Wright Brothers' first powered flight, there exists a slight possibility it will instead be incorporated in the State of the Union address at the end of January."

It has been 31 years since an American last set foot on the moon and 14 years since the president's father, President George H. W. Bush, proposed a new American manned mission to Mars.


AND NOW MY STORY:

little sarbonn to announce mission to local Best Buy

Kalamazoo, MI (UPN) - In an unexpected announcement to be made today at approximately 3:15 pm, little sarbonn will announce a trip to the local Best Buy. Reporters note that it has been quite a few weeks since little sarbonn last took a trip to Best Buy, and they were pessimistic about the reasons little sarbonn might have to making this trip.

Neolithic Airhead Stupidpeople Association (NASA) spokesperson Duran Duran stated that it has been a long time since little sarbonn has taken a trip to Best Buy, and as a result many people all across this great nation are concerned that if he does not make this trip there soon, he may lose his window of opportunity.

Critics indicated that they felt little sarbonn was taking this trip to Best Buy for nefarious reasons, including a desire to get a computerized dictionary so he could look up the word "nefarious". Other critics say that little sarbonn is only attempting to boost his approval rating that has slumped ever since he kicked that little baby during his re-election campaign for Dog Catcher. little sarbonn's campaign manager indicated, "Best Buy won't be no baby kickin', I tell ya!"

People on the street were interviewed, and their reactions were varied.

"That little sarbonn is just nuts, I tell you," said Laeder Hosen, his next door neighbor, who was seen "borrowing" little sarbonn's lawnmower unannounced. "Never know what the hell he's gonna do. Why, just last week, he went to the store and bought a whole can of peanuts. Ate them right there through that window while I watched him with my binoculars. He just ain't right."

"I can't understand why little sarbonn is going to Best Buy when his big brother Big Sarbonn said last week that he wanted to go to Wal-Mart," said Paris Hilton, some random socialite who was milking a cow in little sarbonn's backyard. "I mean, he's been to Best Buy already. Why must he keep going back where he's already been?"

"That little sarbonn is just dreamy," said some random woman that little sarbonn is presently trying to find no matter what the cost.

Yet, it seems clear that little sarbonn has all intentions of traveling to Best Buy sooner rather than later. All of the other people on his block indicated they were shocked at this announcement, and the guy who lives across the street from him announced that if little sarbonn goes to Best Buy, he's sure that trip is going to be used to buy a rifle at the nearby K-Mart, so he feels he may have to visit MC Sports and buy a rifle of his own, just to make sure that little sarbonn's trip to Best Buy didn't create a destabilizing problem between the two neighbors.

All we here at UPN can say is Godspeed, little sarbonn!

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The Computer Revisited
Well, right now I am typing this on my computer with the new motherboard. I don't know that that means that computer is going to continue to work, but I'm going to be leaving it on for the night just to see if it happens to be fixed (so I don't get fooled into believing things are better than they really are).

I swear, this has been nothing but frustrating since being involved in it. And it's not like I really have a lot of time. Right now, I have to head on to class, and I still have about 15 pages to write for my paper that is due tomorrow. My problem isn't filling those 15 pages. My problem is that I have about 30 pages worth of notes that I somehow have to condense to much less than that.

I think I'm going to be working with Dr. Kuersten again next semester, as she did request me again. She definitely keeps me busy, and I guess that keeps me honest.

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Here is my latest article in the Western Herald
Award Winning WMU forensics team deserves more attention

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Occam's Razor
I could sure use Occam's Razor right now because all other things considered, I am left with the most logical conclusion, and that's that I am in need of shaving.

--just a silly little posting I added today to a message board where I post a lot

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Polygamy
Okay, maybe it's me, but there are these weirdos out there who are really bizarre who marry multiple wives, and these women seem to really want them. Lots of them, too.

And I can't find a girlfriend. Just one.

Maybe I should just become some suspicious looking weirdo. Well, weirder than I already am....

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That computer thing
Okay, this is really getting on my nerves. My computer has been out of service longer than it has been working, and I just got it. I bought it 3 and a half months ago, and it hasn't been working for two months. They've sworn it was the software (wasn't the software), then the video card (wasn't the video card), and then finally the motherboard. It takes them two and a half weeks to send a part, and now to send out a motherboard, they've now taken an extra two weeks to send out someone who is supposed to install it. But to add more fun, the guy who called me stating he would put it in just took my call (after a week of trying to get him to return a phone call) and said something about there was a problem and he'd have to have some other guy give me a call back (which after five hours, he hasn't). This computer is becoming such a problem, and it is getting so frustrating. The sad thing is: I think I knew what the problem was on the first day, and that is the power supply. So now I have to wait a few more days to find out that Battle Creek (where the guy is who is supposed to install the motherboard) is too far and that Ibuypower has to find someone closer. I am predicting a week before I hear anything from ANYONE.

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