Dreams of a lego spaceman...

This is the official page of author Duane Gundrum. It is also the portal for the comic strip The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Legospaceman.

Monday, September 25, 2006

Gotta love our media for its...oh just look at the picture!

Well, if you are in Europe, Asia or Latin America, Newsweek gives you a cover that is quite similar. Not if you're in the US. In the US, we get a picture of Annie Leibowitz. It's kind of hard to make a comment. The pictures pretty much tell all. This is probably why more and more young people get their news from the Daily Show. You can't really count on the regular news sources anymore in this country.
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Friday, September 22, 2006

Heading to Berkeley for the weekend

The Forensics team is heading to UC Berkeley for a weekend tournament. It does feel like I've been out of this activity for so long that this should end up being "interesting".

I ran into Anna last night. She's working at Delta College now as a coach, and she brought her team to UOP to run a scrimmage for debate practice. It was weird seeing her after all this time. I kept our conversation really short and bowed out so that I could help some of the interp people work on their speeches.
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Thursday, September 21, 2006

Do you think Hugo Chavez would do me a favor?

It was reported today that Hugo Chavez's rant against President Bush, included a comment that all Americans should read Noam Chomsky's book. Well, that book was about 199,000 on the bestselling charts before the speech. It's 22 now.

Well, this got me thinking. Do you think Chavez would be willing to go to the UN, call Bush the devil again and then say "All Americans should read "Thompson's Bounty" by Duane Gundrum!"

I mean, it just might work.
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Monday, September 18, 2006

Started sending stuff out again

I've been telling myself I'd do it, so I have my first five query letters ready to send out, and I'll be sending them out tomorrow for The Ameriad. Sometimes, the business part is the hardest part of writing.
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Saturday, September 16, 2006

Friends, no benefits and changing a lifestyle

According to Miller and Steinberg's Developmental Model, we tend to go from a stage where we are in surface level relationships to a state where we have involved higher end psychosocial attributes that have been achieved through complex renegotiations of a relationship. Having absorbed this model, I'm realizing this is where I've been dysfunctional in practically every relationship I have ever had.

Getting into a full blown relationship with a woman for me is almost an impossible task. I'm really good at getting a relationship started, but almost always it ends up in a deep friendship that ends up being somewhat frustrating for me over the long run. On the Montel Williams Show, Montel used to bring on his brother who had a philosophy that he had no desire for friendships with women, that the only thing he was seeking from women was a sexual relationship. People, including me, used to ridicule this approach because of its crass process of objectification. But one thing that used to fascinate me about his approach was that he was brutally honest about this. He never led anyone on into believing that he was being a friend in a completely altruistic manner. His goals were always on the table, and in a way that was kind of significant to his approach.

Things haven't really worked out for me. Almost all of my relations with women are as friendships. A woman I know, who is extremely critical of everything I do and not interested in me in any way, shape or form, offered some insight a few months back when she projected her belief that these friendships happen because the women in my life aren't really all that interested in me in the first place (kind of the "she's not that in to you" kind of argumentation). She was responding to my claim that I can't seem to ever have a relationship that isn't a friendship; she is quite blunt in the way she puts her projections forward.

So, is this really it? My original theory of it being my fault for allowing a potential relationship to "fall" into a friendship is completely incorrect, and the reality is that this is as good as it's ever going to get because the women who inhabit my life aren't that interested in me in the first place? I mean, I sometimes suspect this when I'm with a group of women who happen to be my "friends" and they're talking about some "hot" guy, who never happens to be me.

If this is the more applicable theory, then it explains a lot of things. I became very close to someone not too long ago, and it never went beyond friendship. She told me she wasn't really into a relationship at the time, but is that just a convenient form of stating, "sorry, Duane, it's just not going to be you"? I don't date that much, so I don't always have that good a reference base to figure out exactly what is going on, but it's starting to look more and more like that is quite possibly what has happened.

Which brings up another problem: Whenever I invest in one of these friendships, I've discovered that I put as much energy into them as I would do if I was dating. The energy input is identical, and secretly I think it's because I believe that if I put full attention on the relationship, somehow it's going to grow into something beyond friendship. But it never does. Instead, what I think is happening is the person I'm with in friendship gets EVERY benefit of actually dating me without ever having to date me. Why would someone change that relationship dynamic to something more intimate when it's not necessary?

So I am going to change things. Since moving to California, I've started to notice that the energy involved in maintaining these friendships in the first place has been pretty much on my side only, anyway. I'm also noticing that the women with whom I'm coming in contact here in California are becoming EXACTLY what I've been used to, the friendship variety that gets my full attention. It's not going to happen anymore.

Instead, I'm going to devote my energy to either writing or finding one person. If it turns to friendship, it remains there and I'm doing NOTHING to make it grow any further. It takes too much energy to continue these sorts of things, and I really don't feel the energy coming from the other side, so why continue to do what's really not working?

It may mean changing the very nature of how I handle past, present and future relationships, but too many people take me for granted. I've decided that if someone wants to pursue something further, I'm open to it, but sitting on the sidelines listening to someone's problems they're having with some other guy is no longer going to be a part of my lifestyle.

I really don't see any other choice.
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Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Interpersonal Communication

As part of my requirements here at UOP, I need to teach two discussion sessions. The first is public speaking, which with my Forensics and debate background, is pretty easy. The only complication is the use of nomenclature and terminology, which reading the required information makes for easy processing. The actual sharing of information in the classes is easy because my forte IS communication to groups, which is all what this course is about.

My other discussion section is a little more difficult. I also teach Interpersonal Communication. Now, for those who have had conversations with me, I tend to be capable of holding a conversation. But that's usually with people I know. Part of the allure of interpersonal communication is that it also helps you with people you don't know, and to be honest, that's always been one of my complications. As an investigator, I was very good at surface conversations that are designed to pick out pieces of information, but always I had a goal of achieving some piece of information. Conversations were generally investigations rather than give and take processes that integrate the very nature of communication itself (where the back and forth messages constitute communication rather than one side sending messages and the other being assumed the messages were received).

Well, like I was saying before, those who know me probably may not have realized it, but it took time for me to get to know them well enough to be conversational with them beyond a surface level. It's part of why I don't really have a lot of friends, but when I do have friends, they tend to be really, really close friends.

This makes the teaching of interpersonal communication an interesting process. I do happen to be fortunate, however, in that the professor for whom I'm teaching the discussion session is also the professor of the graduate course I am taking, which is the graduate study of Interpersonal Communication. While I was doing the Ph.D. work (and even the MA work) in political science at Western Michigan University, I hit a point where I really wasn't learning anything anymore. I was culling information from sources and self-learning about specific issues. This is probably the first time in a very long time that I'm studying something that has the potential of being extremely useful to me over the long haul.

I once wrote a very self-referential play called Southern Hospitality that chronicled the breakup of a male actor (me) and his girlfriend (yes, there was a person, but who she was is not all that important for this blog). Their final issue is that he was incapable of telling her that he loved her. During one final scene, he realizes why they're going to break up when he says: "I finally realize the problem. You have trouble talking in front of an audience but you're great with individuals. I can talk comfortably in front of dozens, hundreds, even thousands, but put me in front of one person, someone I like, someone I love, and I just completely fall apart."

This should be an interesting semester.
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Wednesday, September 06, 2006

The young, coolness factor of Anderson Cooper



In case you didn't know, CNN hails Anderson Cooper as the reporter who covers all of the young people, the one they turn to in hopes of building the ratings for CNN in the younger demographic. You know that demographic. The young kids attending college with the endless streams of disposable cash.

Well, I have some bad news for CNN and Anderson Cooper. None of my students have ever heard of him. They don't consider him OR CNN to be cool. To be even more significant, they didn't really find ANY news to be cool, unless they knew there was something happening that required them to follow the news.

So, what is a CNN icon like Anderson to do? Who cares? I just find it hilarious, as it was brought up by one of my students, that no one knows, cares or feels passionate in any way about Anderson Cooper.
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Monday, September 04, 2006

Nickle and diming us

I've rented movies from Hollywood Video for a long time now. When I arrived in Stockton, I was happy to see the chain doing smashingly here. So, I signed up here to continue my membership. I then rented a few movies (as my Netflix is taking forever to figure out my real address...they keep changing my address to bizarre ones that don't make any sense, and thus, I can't get any of my Netflix movies, nor do I even know where they are).

Well, yesterday, I went in to rent another movie, and I was then asked if I wanted to purchase "insurance" for 25 cents. The old way of damage to a dvd or video being handled on a case by case basis, with the company understanding that sometimes damage does happen, is over. Instead, now you have to pay an overpriced amount of money to rent a movie (about four bucks for an old movie, which is really somewhat ridiculous in the era of competition against monthly charges from the mail service companies that rent movies) AND you now have to pay 25 cents per movie, or you will be charged full price for a dvd if it is damaged in any way. I said no, rented my movie, but when I turn it in today, I will NEVER rent from Hollywood Video again.

This reminds me of when Netflix thought it had a captured audience and raised the rates for all of its services. I was on the 5 movies at a time rate, and they raised my rate by about seven or eight dollars (could have been more). My response was to push my service back down to the 3 at a time rate. My understanding is that a LOT of people did this, and a LOT of people just discontinued the service completely. So, proving a basic proclamation of Economics 101, raising the prices did not mean more money, but even less. So, Netflix, realizing it was losing massive amounts of business, and seeing that Blockbuster was about to hit the scene of doing the same exact business, lowered rates to their original amounts. So, I upped my service back to 5 at a time.

This also reminds me of how bad a state our big box stores are when it comes to electronics. In the old days, a company like Panasonic would make a VCR that would last years without any need for repair. They made GOOD products. Well, now, everyone that makes electronics makes crap that lasts a year or so, if lucky. So companies like Best Buy are now producing a new profit stream by "offering" you additional "protection", kind of like the mob offers you protection from their own goons. If you pay $70 or so bucks for a $300 purchase, you can be guaranteed that when the sucky product you bought breaks, you can get it replaced. This replaces the old process of where a company actually backed its products by replacing their products that broke.

What it appears is that these companies are looking for more and more ways to separate us from our money. They aren't doing us a "service" by charging us more for something that used to be expected. And the usual argument is that "prices are cheaper these days", but that has nothing to do with the value of the product. It has EVERYTHING to do with the labor process they use to get the work done. Panasonic making a shitty product has nothing to do with Best Buy getting extra money to replace Panasonic's shitty product. The labor is cheaper already because we're outsourcing so much of this stuff as it is. Most of the profit is going into profit sharing of shareholders, not into the production of good, long-lasting materials. It certainly isn't going to the college kid working at Best Buy to work his way through college. It most definitely isn't going into training because the only knowledgeable workers at these places are ones that are techno geeks who already know about the products before they took the job in the first place. In my experience, especially here in Stockton, 75 percent of the workers at Best Buy should be feared for their lack of knowledge and sometimes their inability to think logically. Just yesterday, I had a guy tell me that a chair in Best Buy was $200 and there were none available, even though two were on the shelf behind me, clearly marked at the regular price of $146. He didn't even bother to look at the shelf but just spouted out a wrong number, convinced that was all he really was required to do because of whatever reason an hourly worker believes is the reason he doesn't need to actually know what he's doing.

Which brings me to rudeness. I'm not sure when this happened, but when did hourly workers suddenly become impediments to the buying process? I've gone to restaurants lately where you get no service, and when you do, it's some very rude person who really doesn't want to be there. I had one guy start an argument with me (BEFORE I SPOKE) that appeared to be continuing an argument he was having with someone else before he reached my table. I'm currently reading Slavenka Drakulic's Cafe Europa, about the observations a female Croatian writer has about the transition of Eastern Europe to westernization. She has a chapter titled, "A Smile in Sofia" about how shopworkers in former Communist countries tend to be very rude and unfriendly, mainly because this was how they were trained to be, and there appears to be no rationality as to why they should change (as being friendly is often interpreted as suspicious behavior in an economic transaction, coupled with the idea that when you have a job for life with no fear of ever losing it, your customers need you more than you need them). So, this leaves me wondering if there's some similar dynamic happening in America, but with an American spin. Instead of having jobs for life, perhaps there's a feeling that the jobs being filled in the retail world are so low of scale that there's no fear of having to be friendly because even if they lose the job, it's not much of a loss in the first place. I wouldn't give this a second thought, but when you come across a friendly person, it makes these other people stick out like you wouldn't believe.

This may sound strange, but it's been the foreign folk in retail so far that tend to be the friendliest. I rarely like to bring up race or ethnicity because I'm not a strong believer in any type of differences, even in mindset alone, and I understand that my experiences may just be spurious ones with no connection to the bigger picture at large, but when at the mall, I found two typical American college students working at the pizza counter that treated everyone who came across them as distractions to their job. I ended up deciding not to eat there and went to the Chinese food counter where a very nice young woman of Asian heritage spoke in a very friendly manner and even put forth the comment that she didn't understand why those guys were always so rude to people.
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Saturday, September 02, 2006

Visiting a bookstore


It's been a little while since I had the chance to visit a bookstore and just buy some books. But here's what I came home with today.

Bruce Campbell is one of my favorite b-movie actors. I'm really looking forward to reading this particular book.

But I also bought a few more books as well. I found myself somewhat fascinated with some of the selections in the cultural studies area of the bookstore, and here's what I came home with.


As I've always been fascinated with Asian culture and languages, I thought this might be a very interesting book to pick up as well. We're living in a time where cultural stereotypes are being challenged and turned on their head. I thought it would be an interesting book to read while examining just how those stereotypes are changing, while others are being strengthened at the behest of those needing to change them.

Several other books I picked up include the 2007 editions of both the Novel & Short Story Writer's Market and Guide to Literary Agents. I also picked up this interesting new book called Reading Like A Writer: A Guide for People Who Love Books And For Those Who Want To Write Them. Figure I can never have too many books that support the writing lifestyle, even if I keep feeling like it's just not happening for me.


My first week
The first week went somewhat okay. I find myself a lot busier than I was at WMU, aside from the last year there which seemed to be the year of hell. My schedule is completely filled, and I just don't seem to be able to do anything more. I'd like to actually find a girlfriend one of these days, but I keep realizing that I have so little time. It's kind of frustrating.

It looks like most of the administrative stuff is taken care of, although there are so many loose ends that still need to be tied up, and I find myself sometimes overwhelmed because I can't remember what all of those loose ends are. I'm teaching three days a week, coaching three times a week, attending class two days a week and every few weekends I'll need to go to a tournament to coach on the team (and judge rounds).

With all of this, I intend to work on To Touch the Unicorn and get it ready for sending out for publication. Fun, fun, fun!
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